Previously in the Phoenix household we were bombarded by the pitter-patter of tiny feet. Marie and Elijah had a daughter named Marie, then Ellen and Ex-Contessa Annie plopped out triplets - Romeo, Juliet and William. Much child neglect happened.
We start off with some good news; the triplets growing up. Woo. Here's William.
And this is Marie dying.
Wait, what? Marie? What the hell, woman!?
Elijah: "Oh please Grim, save my poor wife. I'm too awesome to be a widower."
Grim: "Well, sonny, you've got a point there. ALLAKAHZAM!"
Elijah: "Mini wave of celebration for meeee!"
Ex-Contessa Annie: *bursts into tears*
Marie: "Oh yeah, Hula Zombie, that's the spo-- bwuh? Where am I? I thought I aldready passed through the light at the end of the tunnel."
Yeah, sorry about that, this is me still getting used to my lightning mod. -_-
Marie: "I don't feel so good. All this life pouring back into my body was-- OH SHIT!"
Marie: "OH GOD IT'S LIKE BEING FUCKED BY A SANDPAPER! >______<"
Michelle: "The mortal's pain amuses me. ^_^"
More aliens, hurrah. This is Tommy - alien skin, blue eyes and brown hair.
And thiiiis is Annika, with what I think is a geneticized skintone, blue eyes and brown hair.
Luckily there were not any more babies pouring out of her clown car-ian ladyparts.
DOMO ARIAGATO MISTER ROBOTO. Hope you are happy now.
Oh, and here is Romeo who finally got to age up with his siblings.
Marie: "Look, honey, I made a tsunami in the toilet! :D"
Elijah: "That's... that's great, honeycakes. Really something."
6528756287 biological ones is not enough for you? o_Ô
I think we need a holiday. A very long holiday.
Elijah: "Bye, grandma, have fun with the kids while we're on holiday!"
Michelle: "Ooh, holiday? How fun! We're we going?"
Oops, it looks like the cow plant ate some innocent townie back there.
Michelle: "Where are we going? Guys? H-hello?"
This almost made me feel bad for deciding to leave her with the kids (which was not the best idea in the first place). She just stood there gazing towards the horizon until the sun came up. T_T But I was not about to bring a vampire on a tropical holiday - I do not think she would tan too well.
I guess it would have looked a little bit like this, but with more death. You do realize that you do not burst into flames, do you, Ex-Contessa Annie?
Ex-Contessa Annie: "I still haven't seen the sun in 600 years, and that was before global warming and the ozone layer being fucked up and all that jazz, so I'm allowed to be a bit vampiric--"
Ex-Contessa Annie: "OOOOH, look! Sand!! This is, like, amazing! I'm gonna grow up to be a pirate! ^_^"
Elijah has been here a grand total of five minutes, and he is already sandwiched between his wife and a local. Nice going, dear.
Elijah: "Uh... Thanks?"
Local: "So, this is what the cool kids are doing around here! Hang loose!"
Elijah: "Like this!? Rawrrgrawwwl!"
Yeah, Mowgli, I think I am with Marie on this one. Sorry. At least he was the only one who did not stand and scratch his head when being presented by the absolutely complicated local gesture.
I sent the elders off on a relaxing parasailing tour. In hindsight, parasailing was perhaps not the most elder-friendly activity to pick from, but... eh.
Ahh~ this makes me relaxed just looking at it. Then I look out of the window and see the slushy melting snow and I am no longer as relaxed. But let us enjoy this idyllic image.
Behold my ELDER-FRIENDLY activities!
No need to worry, Ex-Contessa, they got out of it alright. Just relax, take it eeeeeeeaaaaasyyyy.
Roger enjoys the calming waves, in the middle of the night.
Then he proceeded to freak the fuck out of the locals by trying to embrace their dance.
Charlotte has magical ligher-holding skills. Just look at her dexterity! It probably came from all the parasailing, eh?
Lesbians in their under/swimwear grilling marshmallows on the beach. Add an appropriate soundtrack and we would have the premise of a great cheap porno.
Aww. One big, happy family. ^_^
We are starting early, with a nice, nutritious pineapple surprise and some hard work.
Yeah, do not try to complain here, Elijah, you know you are enjoying every minute of it!
WORK HARDER, MY MINIONS! I see you slacking off there, Charlotte. Did you think you were here to relax!? Think again!
Good work. You may take five minutes off to enjoy yourselves.
On second thoughts, we better get the hell out of here before anyone thinks to call the cops!
Yeah. This is how Ellen and the Ex-Contessa "help" the Witch Doctor. Complaints?
In their defence, the only person with a respectable amount of mechanical points was Roger, and I did not want to risk burning the Mysterious Hut down. We have made enough damage already.
The Phoenix Family: Enjoing other people's misfortune since 2008.
Witch Doctor: "I've got something special for you. It's my d*ck in a box!"
Roger: "Uhmm, err, I... I'm flattered, really, but--"
Witch Doctor: "Just take it."
Why hello there, little fella. Are you not just the creepiest little thing I have ever seen?
No, no, we did not just come for the gift and then left right away. Why would you think that?
Time to shake those grass skirts, woo!
While Elijah is being adorably awesome I must just point out that I really loved the music here. It reminded me of a Tarantino soundtrack, and I was almost awaiting trippy dialogue, a couple of kickass bitches and lots of blood and blood and gore to come waltzing in from around the corner.
Instead, the taxi arrived. Kind of anti-climatic.
I realized that I forgot to do a lot of things - like the freaking pirates, gaaah - but I think I did quite well for my very first in-game holiday. Well, apart from the vacations the sims could go on in the original sims game, but they were not quite as complicated. :P
Ahhh, remember this lovely view?
Holy shit, Michelle! The house is still standing and the kids seem to be doing alright! Miracles can happen!
Michelle: "What, it was a piece of cake. Just don't go into the basement..."
What basement? You do not have a basement.
Michelle: "Nooo, no, that's right. No basement at all."